As I sit here thinking about what I am going to say, my thoughts are going in a million different directions. I started a blog? Me? Bethany? What could I possibly have to say? Never would I have imagined starting a blog, but I've learned recently that I really enjoy writing, and considering no one wants to read multiple paragraphs on a Facebook timeline, I'll use this as my outlet.
Testimony
First things first, I'd like to share my testimony and the events that have brought me to where I am so that you can have a better understanding of my background.
Pretty much anyone that knows me knows that I am a PK! (Preacher's Kid) I've been in church all my life, so I have always been taught the Gospel and the attributes of Christ. I was saved at the ripe old age of 6 by the grace of God. I'm so thankful that He placed me in a loving, Christian home where I would always be taught the Bible...sometimes more than I wanted. ;)
As time went on, I continued to grow and learn more and more about Jesus in my childhood. I was really quite something in elementary school. I was the tattle-tale. (Shocking I know...) I was the one running and telling the teacher that someone cursed or used God's name in vain. I knew that was wrong so I assumed everyone should know. And if they didn't, well I would tell them.
I'm saying all that to say that as I got older, I took for granted being taught truth my whole life. My thinking was, well, I get preached to all the time, I hear this all the time...why should I study more? I wasn't interested in Theology or deepening my relationship with Jesus. Especially as a teen, I cared more about myself. This is what inspired the name of my blog, which still applies to me today. I was even to the point where I considered Charles Spurgeon to be a live and well English Preacher preaching somewhere in the U.S. today. (gasp!)
In 2010 and at 20 years old, I found myself out in the workforce all by myself. Since I had been working with my family all of my life at Sears, it was quite an adjustment. Suddenly, I was working for someone who was not my daddy and co-workers who were not related to me in any way. This was a real eye-opener. There were people here having conversations about religion that did not agree with me! What? Do these people exist? Don't get me wrong, I've had plenty of conversations with folks through the years, but most of the time Daddy was right by my side to explain things and answer questions that I didn't know. There I was, all by myself, with no one to come to my defense. This was like a flash of lightning that hit me. I suddenly realized that I didn't know as much as I thought I knew. I knew WHAT I believed. I did not know WHY I believed it.
I've been taught truth my whole life, but the problem was that I didn't take the time and effort to figure things out for myself in order to teach others. I was very convicted of my apathy, and really started to dig to have a deeper understanding of Scripture. This wasn't easy stuff either. This was things such as Election, Predestination, Calvinism (Doctrines of Grace) ....My mind was blown as I started learning this stuff on my own and inquiring. I wasn't on my own though, as the Lord was granting me understanding, and my Dad and Associate Pastor helped me a TON! I had so many questions.
As I started studying, I started to fall in love with the Savior again. (All glory to Him!) I'm thoroughly convinced that He put me in that situation to make me see my ignorance, and not only that but to fulfill his sanctifying work in me and grow me in maturity. I was fascinated by all the things I was learning! I was thinking...wow! This is the God I have been serving! I was looking for anything and anyone that could help me learn more. I started listening to preachers such as Paul Washer, John Piper, and Jeff Noblit. Then I discovered Wretched and was instantly hooked, and I started attending conferences at Grace Life Church of the Shoals. The music I was listening to changed. (Sovereign Grace baby!!) My world was turned upside down! I really started to grasp the Gospel and the saving work that Christ fulfilled on the Cross.
So here I am today, realizing how small I am and how big God is, and wanting Him to use my ransomed life to glorify Himself. Still having a lot to learn, still messing up. I have so much to be thankful for! In no way did this happen in my own strength. It was all the Lord's doing and He deserves all praise! Obviously, I'm still a sinner and am by no means where I need to be. I'm reminded of the words of Jeff Nobilt, "Reform and keep reforming, repent and keep repenting..." It's a never-ending process. I am weak, but He is strong! I do hope to offer provoking thoughts and encouragement in my blogs as I write about my experiences or whatever is on my mind, and also use it to challenge myself.
Now, Lord, I would be Yours alone
, and live so all might see
The strength to follow Your commands could never come from me.
O Father, use my ransomed life in any way You choose, and let my song forever be
My only boast is You!
Soli Deo Gloria!
